finding::God::in the everyday

This past weekend we treated the “artistic” side of our children and bought them each an artist’s canvas.  It just amazes me how a small detail like moving from plain paper to an actual canvas makes a world of difference to them~they were very eager to get started so, yesterday we set in to painting their creations.  Jared is decorating his bathroom after his favorite cartoon, so both him and Jonah designed their canvas after that.  The girls are painting beach-themed designs to match their bathroom as well.  And let’s just say that mom had quite a bit of work ahead of her as well!

Jonah started by drawing with a pencil on his canvas.  I was quite scared at first, but then I noticed he was drawing on the reverse side, so relief set in and he drew what he really intended on the proper side.  It was just too cute to paint over, so mom sat down and patiently painted around Mr. Jonah’s “alien frog” and then outlined the pencil lines in marker.  Rachel decided on a rainbow over the water, so mommy lovingly drew the rainbow and water line to get her started.  Jared needed a little help, not much, on measuring out his symbol, so with ruler and pencil mom helped to guide his lines.  Sarah drew hers just fine, but the questions and advice were never-ending in making all her decisions.  We ended the day with check marks next to laughter, fun, adventure, getting messy, creativity, helping, and spending time together.  We also ended with unfinished creations that would need attention at the next sun-up.

This morning as my eyes opened, I was still tired, had a few body aches, etc.  I thought of those unfinished works and thought to myself, “I am SO not in the mood for painting today”…”I DO NOT have the patience for this today~UGH”!  I found myself confessing my grumpiness and my impatience to the Lord; asking for more of the Spirit to love, help, encourage, and especially for the Spirit’s patience.  We made it through the day with some ups and downs in attitude; for the downs I am quite ashamed that I took back the reigns from the Spirit there, but we completed our tasks in good time to celebrate showing them to daddy at the end of the day.  They were absolutely precious:

This all got me to thinking today about the attributes of God.  Where would we be if one day God got up in the morning and said, “I am SO not in the mood to deal with her problems today”?  God is not such.  His patience, His love, His mercy, His grace is all new and more than enough to share with us freely each and every day.  Here are some words from Him to bring us each encouragement today:

*Deut. 4:31   (For the Lord thy God is a merciful God) he will not forsake thee, neither destroy thee, nor forget the covenant of thy fathers which he sware unto them.

*Deut. 31:6   Be strong and of good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the Lord thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.

*I Samuel 12:22  For the Lord will not forsake his people for his great name’s sake: because it hath pleased the Lord to make you his people.

*Psalms 94:14  For the Lord will not cast off his people, neither will he forsake his inheritance.

*Lamentations 3:22-23  It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.  They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.

*Matthew 28:20  “…and lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world.  Amen.”

*II Cor 9:8  And God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that ye, always having all sufficiency in all things, may abound to every good work:

*Galatians  5:22  But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentlenss, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance…

*Hebrews 13:5-6, 8  Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have; for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.  So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me…Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever.

Whatever unfinished task you have on your “to-do” list today, know that you have a Heavenly Father that is there to help you along the way.  Give it to Him…He can turn your half painted canvas into a masterpiece!

“Lord, you are so good.  I praise you for your neverending mercies…I thank you for showering me with them because of who You are, not because of who I am.  Each time I look at my children, I think of Your precious love for me and how much more perfectly You love me.  How I have tried your patience over and over, yet You endure out of your great love.  You, Lord, have taken the mess of my life and made it beautiful in your sight…may You find me always faithful to You; You deserve no less.  Again, I praise You for speaking to me in the simplicity of the every day.  I love you!”

Reading through Psalms 116 today moved me to reflect a little about what God has done for me…reasons why I would think He is worthy of honor and praise in my life.  The psalmist here starts this chapter with the words, “I love the Lord because…”  What a proper way to start:

“I love the Lord because He has raised me up from a life of sin and given me a place in His family.   He has continually been loving and patient with me even though I have not deserved it.  His grace is always sufficient for every need.  His provisions for me are endless from friendships to meals to the simplicity of time.  The Lord my God is the Creator and my friend.  His compassions never fail.  He has given me a life full of blessings; a Godly husband who loves me unconditionally and 4 incredibly wonderful children who are the life of my days.  I have seen Him provide in the midst of sorrow and sickness as well as providing in the laughter and joys.  He is a great God who knows my name and cares deeply for me even if I forget to mention His name in my day.  He is forgiving.  He is just.  His name is the ultimate definition of truth.  He is completely and totally praise worthy…how can I keep from shouting?  The world around me is a mirror of His beauty and majesty.  I see His power in the storms and hear His voice in the winds.  He is good; consistently good and right.  I see the way He cares for the smallest of creatures and have felt His tender touch reach down and care for me when I am hurting.  He loves me…therefore, I can do nothing but to love Him back…He is ever worthy!”

In line with my own reflection, I gave the kids a little writing project.  I had them sit down and write their thoughts on this subject.  They are just too precious not to share:

Jared

I love God because He provides all of our needs and saved me from my sins.  I love Him because He gave me a voice to praise His name and because He made me very creative, He also gave me a mansion in heaven.  I love Him because He gave a roof over my head and food and water to eat and drink.  He gave me the ability to play and have fun, and friends to play with me.  But most important is kind, loving, and understanding mom and dad. 

Sarah

I love God

because He provides for me.

I love God

because He gave me a family.

I love God

because He gave me lots of friends.

I love God

because He saved me and took away my sins.

I love God

because He gave me eternal life.

Rachel

I love the Lord because He is love and He is cool and He is good and He is nice!

Jonah

I love the Lord because He saved me.  He gave me my trains.  God is good because He gave me my mommy.

It sure does a heart good to sit back and remember just who God is and what He has done in your life…so tell me, how would you complete this sentence?  I love the Lord because…….

“Lord God, you are, in fact, worthy.  Thank you for this time of reflection.  Your name is precious on my lips and dear to my heart.  I love the tears that flow from this mother’s eyes as I read of your affect on my children.  Lord, may their hearts always know You and choose to praise you.  They are an inspiration to me. May Your praise always flow freely from my life as a testimony to your love and grace.  You alone Lord, you alone, deserve my focus.  I love You.”

I have been rather quiet lately.  

Not by original intent, but still, unusual silence flows from these finger tips.  

It seems as though God is choosing this time period to speak to the depths of my soul…a searching and trying period I would say.  I am grateful just the same.  I admit that there are corners of my heart that need some dusting.  I recently read again of Elijah in I Kings chapter 19 and caught a glimpse of myself in that picture.  Big events are happening around me…God’s power is revealed, yes, but, that is not how God is speaking to me.  I have found myself needing to be simple and just listen…listen to His still small voice speak softly and there I will find what He has for me. 

I welcome His working, trusting that He is preparing me for what lies down the road ahead.  I understand that it might not be what I expected, but if it is found in Him, it will be perfect and it will be done in His strength alone.

Sitting.

Listening.

Trusting.

“Father, I trust you…you have my full attention”

Jonah lost his first tooth today!  Ok, really what happened is mommy stole Jonah’s tooth today.  If it were up to him he would have worn that tooth until the day he died, he really didn’t want to take it out.  The first day he noticed that it was loose, he came in the room saying “mommy, my tooth is broken” and ever since, we have tried to convince him that he would need to pull it…but he would have NO part in that talk.  He didn’t want to loose his tooth, he loved his tooth, it was his friend he said. 

Today grandma & I took the kids down to the pool.  While we were playing around, I managed to get another look at his “friend”…the poor thing was hanging on by a thread, so while wrestling the sweet boy down with hand stuck in his mouth, mom was able to retrieve the “broken tooth” with great success.  WOO HOO!  NOT!  Jonah was not pleased with what had just taken place.  He was bleeding and that made him mad.  With towel in hand he walked over to the camp office to show daddy.  There the story changed.  He was no longer sad or mad, but ever so proud showing everyone in the office his now “loose tooth”.  He made his way back to the pool, threw down his towel and stood at the top of the steps and showed each of us the vacant tooth space.  Grinning from ear to ear.  In that very instant he grew up before my very eyes.  He has hit a milestone…no longer a baby and so much more a big boy. 

Sarah’s comment to that…I’m surprised mommy isn’t crying already!  Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t!

Sarah…she is now double digits…I know that because she has proceeded to tell me about every 15 mins for the past 2 days.  Yesterday our princess turned 10, my head is still reeling from Jared’s birthday and now this one.  What a challenging but wonderful 10 years it has been.

Sarah is beautiful and as the first daughter, she is quite in control.  She cracks me up with her mothering and her instructions most of the time.  She comes across strong and confident, yet, at times you will find her sitting quietly alone or being shy in conversation.  My favorite times with her are lying on the bed together sharing life or hearty laughter over the silliest things…you know, girlie things.  Yes, she is a challenge, but she is one of my greatest joys.  If she ever gets the chance to enter into a debate class, that girl will be undefeated!  Speaking of school, she is quite the smart one…she constantly amazes me.  She is in love with her American Doll and cares for her as if it were her very own child.  I love to see that nurturing side of her; it’s so precious.  She is style.  She is beauty.  At 3 years old she wanted to be a “real princess”, but now she relishes in knowing that she, in fact, IS a princess because her Father is the King of Kings and that thrills my soul!

Sarah…10…whew, what a girl…what a blessing!

The words of this song are resounding in my soul today:

“Woke up on the wrong side of the bed, the wrong side of the room, the wrong side of the world. Can’t put my finger on the mood. It’s not melancholy, anger or the blues.

I love my husband, my house, my job. Couldn’t be any better, and really what else is there? Then I realize I’m forgetting God, and that’s the root of all my misery. Lord, first of all, how is it between you and me? .”

My life seems a bit off kilter lately and I believe that is the key…sure, I’ve spent a few given moments in prayer.  I’ve read a few scriptures.  But my heart’s meditation have been more self centered lately and that has led me to set aside the focus on the Lord and the ways He might have for me. 

I confess that I have the most patient husband and children than any woman could ever deserve.  They have loved me even in my akwardeness…Lord willing, they will see a renewed purpose and vision within me.  

“Lord, I love you for lovingly woeing me back to you when I stray.  God, forgive my selfishness, turn my thoughts and focus outward.  Thank you for giving the Spirit that convicts.  Change this mommy, this wife, this woman…Lord forgive me for taking it all for granted.  You are precious~I love you!”

How is it even possible that it has been 12 years since the birth our of first born?  Where does the time go?  12 years…12 years.  Mercy, that means I’m a whole 12 years older also…no that can’t be!

Jared is growing into an amazing young man.  He is constantly building new creations, drawing and editing his own comic strips, playing in his endless vat of imagination, and totally cracking us up.  He is hopelessly resourceful…cardboard laying around?…you can count on the fact that he will find a good use for it.  He brings joy and laughter into our family with ease.  He has a sweet heart for the things of God and desires to serve him now and in his future.  He is a love bug.  Jared is also one of those children who you can depend on to get the job done.  Such a joy! 

The baby in him has melted away into the growth of a fine young man.  There are days I miss holding that first son of mine when the nights were quiet and he would sleep on my chest…the baby smell is almost so real that I could sense it now if I tried hard enough.  But God is so good;  He has replaced those distant joys with new, more thrilling ones.  Long gone are the days when Mr. Jared would climb into bed with mommy at night, yet he still has room for the occassional snuggle {thrills my heart}.   The endless hours spent rocking him at night have been replaced by deep conversations over life and all that it offers.  Bedtime stories like “Good Night Moon” and “Barn Yard Dance” have been traded in for “Chronicles” and “Series”  that actually leave us both suspended.   Kiddie meals no longer satisfy, instead you can most often hear “could you pass the…” at least twice during the course of a meal.  The precious baby booties are a thing of the past; he now fits in my shoes!  Simple bedtime prayers thanking God for his family have evolved into heart felt prayers over lost souls and guidance for life’s journey.

Time passes so quickly…it comes and goes without warning.  All we can be sure of is this very moment.  What we make of this one will be what matters.  In this moment, I am ever thankful and filled to the brim with pride over the opportunity to be the mother of Jared Micah Ebert.  My heart sings to see him experiment with his growing wings.  Just a few short moments of time before he will spread them fully to fly out on his own…that is one moment when I’m sure the grace of God will be felt unlike any other.  I don’t wish it any sooner than it will come on it’s own.  For now, I will enjoy the frequent tickles, contangious laughter, creative spirit, and spontanious activity of the young man  God has placed in our household.  Fully blessed!

All my life, mother’s day has been an occasion that always seemed to leave me with strange emotions.  I deeply longed for the love of my mother; to talk with her, laugh with her, play games with her, cook dinner with her…just to know her.  Most years I carried a bit of sadness with me on this day.  On the flip side, I possessed the generous love of a grandmother {aka: memaw}; she sacrificially gave up her life to serve me and mine.  She made sure she talked with me, played games with me {her favorite was paper dolls}, she laughed with me {crazy laughter sometimes}, she let me watch her make dinner {even the fried bologna}, she told me so many stories…just so that I would know her better.  Sharing church with her on this day made me feel special.  Emotions were based upon choice…would I linger on the hurt, or embrace the love?

As life seasons, I am learning more about these emotions.  I see God’s purposes every step of the way.  I hold a deeper love for my dear Memaw through this perspective.  She is a hero in every way.  A lady worth honor and my regret is that I did not always show her the respect she fully deserved. 

Today I sat in church with my own dear children.  As I was holding a hand, stroking my fingers through their hair, or wiping a sweaty brow, I was reminded of the longing I had as a child.  My Father’s love showered over me and made me acutely aware of loving my kids.  In the midst of emotion, I am faced, once again, with choice…I resolve {choose} to talk with my children, to share my life with them, to teach them, to play with them…to let them know that I love them each and every day. 

Joy.  Love.  Contentment.  Laughter.  It is all in the simplicity of choice.

During our recent trip to southern Philippines we had the opportunity to spend a few days on the beaches there.  One beach was known for it’s surf-worthy waves and incredible views of those very waves crashing onto near by rocky shores, while the next graced it’s shored with beautiful white sands.  One day we climbed up the side of a mountain to a meditation area overlooking the “long islands” of Samar…breath taking beauty to say the least.

Aside from the aray of beautiful beaches, 3 volcanoes were visible from our journeys…with smoke still billowing!  Thoughts of just how small I am in comparison were never ceasing. 

As always, my heart was captured by the wonder and amazement of the sights…my heart focused on the mighty power of the God we serve.  To stand within meters of the roaring waves is almost more than one can take in at one time. 

God had drawn me in with this beauty…captured my attention…while my eyes were fixed, He led me to know more of His almighty power and to be reminded of just how praise worthy He is:

*Psalms 95:1-6*

O come, let us sing unto the Lord: let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation.  Let us come before his presence with thanksgiving, and make a joyful noise unto him with psalms.  For the Lord is a great God, and a great King above all gods.  In his hand are the deep places of the earth; the strength of the hills is his also.  The sea is his, and he made it: and his hands formed the dry land.  O come, let us worship and bow down: let us kneel before the Lord our maker.

*Psalms 93:4*

The Lord on high is mightier than the noise of many waters, yea, than the mighty waves of the sea.

*Psalms 104:24-25, 31-34*

O Lord, how manifold are thy works! in wisdom hast thou made them all: the earth is full of thy riches.  So is this great and wide sea, there in are things creeping innumerable, both small and great beasts….The glory of the Lord shall endure for ever: the Lord shall rejoice in his works.  He looketh on the earth, and it trembleth: he toucheth the hills, and they smoke.  I will sing unto the Lord as long as I live:  I will sing praise to my God while I have my being.  My meditation of him shall be sweet: I will be glad in the Lord.

*Isaiah 40:12, 21-22, 28*

Who hath measured the waters in the hollow of his hand, and meted out heaven with the span, and comprehended the dust of the earth in a measure, and weighed the mountains in scales, and the hills in a balance? … Have ye not known?  have ye not heard?  hath it not been told you from the beginning?  Have ye not understood from the foundations of the earth?  It is he that sitteth upon the circle of the earth, and the inhabitants thereof are as grasshoppers that stretcheth out the heavens as a curtain, and spreadeth them out as a tent to dwell in:….Hast thou not known?  hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary?  there is no searching of his understanding.

The words from Psalms 95…”In His hands are the deep places of the earth”…resounded in my being as we sat in our little blue boat riding across the ocean to a nearby island.  I had no choice but to bow my face before Him and recognize Him for what He is worth.  Completely humbled that He would chose to befriend me; that He would chose to love me even in my utter humanness.  I will forever be grateful for the humility that met me there in that boat…”{Oh Lord} what is man that you are mindful of him”?

I would like to introduce my son, Jared, to the blogworld out there.  He is 11 years old and has decided that he would like to start his own blog; a way to portray “life in the Philippines” from his point of view.  You can read his first couple of writings here.  Also, make sure you add him to your subscription list, I’m sure you wouldn’t want to miss anything!  {shameless advertising at it’s best!} 

Thank you for your support!